As I’ve mentioned before, a big problem in Korea is girls who flake on you. You might have plans set in stone with her for Friday night, then when the time comes, she’ll either send you a cursory text message a few minutes before you’re supposed to meet or she sometimes just won’t show up at all without even calling.
You must have a one strike policy with girls like this.
It’s quite obvious that they are just playing games with you, but the more important factor is that she just doesn’t value your time or your value as a man. This kind of disrespect is completely intolerable.
While this may seem like an obvious thing, in the situation it often isn’t. Girls are masters of making excuses, and they’ve been doing it their whole lives. You’re late turning in a paper at school? Make up an excuse. You forgot to text the boy you’re leading on? Make up an excuse. You cheated on your boyfriend with some stranger at the club? Make up an excuse.
I’ve heard all sorts of stuff from these girls. One girl got me three (!!!) times before I called it quits on her. While I’m not proud of it, it’s true. And I kept being more understanding than I should have because her excuses were incredible. The last time she flaked on me, she told me that her sister was rushed to the hospital suddenly and she forgot to message me to cancel. When I asked what was wrong with her sister, after about a ten-minute break to think, she just responded back, “The doctors still don’t know. It must be pretty serious.” What a load of crap.
Instead of accepting their flaking and excuses, just cut them off and don’t make plans with them again. It helps more if you tell them exactly why you’re cutting off contact, so hopefully they at least will learn and not do it again in the future. But if you play it right, it can actually work out in your favor.
One time I had met a girl at a bar, and we made plans to meet the following Wednesday. We were going to meet at dinner time, and she called me at about 5 to cancel for our dinner at 7. She told me that her parents had suddenly decided they were all going out for dinner together and she had to go with them. I told her that was fine, but I don’t let girls cancel on me so I would be deleting her number and not calling back. She called back immediately, invited me to dinner with her family, and then she went back to my place and we had sex that same night. Essentially, I told her that her behavior was unacceptable, and she rewarded me with sex.
Koreans don’t usually shit test their men as much as their western counterparts do, but their business of flaking and canceling is a countrywide favorite. Don’t succumb to it, don’t fall for her bullshit. Call her out on what she’s doing, then delete her number and forget about her.
And never – NEVER – let her cancel on you twice.
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